What Expenses Can Be Included in a Funeral?
Funeral costs can come from several providers and decisions. A category-by-category list helps families compare complete arrangements.
Areas of guidance
Preparing so decisions are not left to family
A general starting point for thinking ahead, calmly and in your own time. This page quotes no figures of any kind.
Unhurried by design
Funeral cost planning at a glance
- Decisions
- The part families actually find hard
- No figures
- Costs vary by region and by choice
- Two sittings
- Better than one long attempt
- No cost
- Consultations carry no obligation
The subject
Mostly about decisions, not arithmetic
Two things get bundled together here. There is the cost, which is practical, and there are the decisions, which are the part families find difficult.
The difficulty is rarely that a family cannot decide. It is that they cannot decide with any confidence they are doing what the person would have wanted.
Questions worth thinking through
- What you would want handled, and by whom.
- What you would specifically not want, which is often easier.
- Whether your wishes are written anywhere family could find them.
- Whether you are content for family to choose freely on the rest.
- Which conversations have happened, and which are still outstanding.
Why people ask
Why people raise it
- 01Having watched it happen
- Most often somebody has helped another family through it without guidance, and does not want to leave their own in that position.
- 02A relative started the subject
- Someone else recorded their wishes, and it prompted the thought that nothing has been written down on this side of the family.
- 03The timing question
- Some costs arrive before an estate is settled, which raises who covers them in the interval. That is a practical thing to ask about.
- 04It is lighter than expected
- The subject has a reputation for being morbid, and that reputation is most of what stops people addressing it at all.
01
When people get in touch
There is rarely urgency behind it. Something small usually raises the subject and makes it feel worth addressing.
A first conversation is short and unhurried, and mostly establishes what matters to you and what genuinely does not.
- Having recently helped arrange a funeral for somebody else
- A relative starting to talk about their own wishes
- Realising nobody in the family knows what you would want
- Being the person who would be expected to arrange things
02
What to have ready
Very little. Anything that genuinely matters to you, even if it is only one thing, is enough to start.
This conversation asks for no documents and no figures. Bringing nothing at all is a workable starting point.
- Anything that genuinely matters to you, even one thing
- Anything you would specifically not want
- Who you would want involved in decisions
- Whether any conversation has already happened with family
Where you are
Funeral cost planning where you are
Distance changes what a family has to arrange, so each of these answers a different question.
Worth knowing
What makes this easier than expected
- 01
It does not have to be settled in one sitting
A short first conversation that is explicitly incomplete works better than one long attempt at everything.
- 02
Saying most of it does not matter is useful
Families over-arrange because nobody feels able to choose simply for someone else. Say the simple option is fine.
- 03
A note does not need legal standing
It is not a legal document here. What matters is that it is findable, dated, and that one other person knows.
- 04
Nobody has to be persuaded
If a relative does not want to discuss it, pressing rarely helps. Recording your own wishes still has value.
Next step
Talk with Arsine about planning ahead
This conversation is deliberately slower than the others. It starts with what matters to you rather than with figures, and nothing is decided.
Questions
Questions families ask about planning ahead
Three that come up before anything else.
Do I need to have decided everything before a conversation?
No. Most people arrive with one or two things that matter to them and no view on the rest, which is a perfectly workable starting point. Saying that the rest is up to the family is itself useful information.
Why are there no cost figures anywhere on this page?
Because costs vary considerably by region and by the choices made at the time, so a national average is not a useful number for any particular family. This website quotes no figures, averages or statistics of any kind.
What if a relative does not want to discuss it?
That is a legitimate position and pressing it rarely helps. Recording your own wishes still has value, and it establishes that the subject can be discussed in the family at all.
Further reading
More on planning funeral costs ahead
A Practical Funeral Cost Planning Checklist
A written plan does not need to decide every detail. It should make wishes, contacts, costs, and unanswered questions easier to find.
Writing Down What You Would Rather Not Happen
Asked what they want, most people say they do not mind. Asked what they would rather not happen, the same people answer immediately and in detail.
Request a consultation
Start whenever you are ready
Short, unhurried, and explicitly incomplete if that suits you better. No cost and no obligation.